Have you ever looked across at someone, maybe on the train, or in a supermarket and wondered what is going through their mind? What is it that has just made them smile? Maybe news of a family engagement; perhaps a romantic text; or was it a poignant song that had brought back happy memories?
I’m going to start with a quote from Robin Williams, a hugely talented actor and comedian, who tragically took his own life in August 2014.
“You know what music is? God’s little reminder that there’s something else besides us in the universe; a harmonic connection between all living beings, everywhere, even the stars.”
This is such a beautiful sentiment. The power of music and how it can stir up many different emotions within us.
- A reminder of our first true love, making us feel dreamy and youthful
- Perhaps a poignant song at a funeral, giving us an overwhelming feeling of sadness
- Maybe just a tune you sang along to with your dad, which fills you with amusement
- Or even your latest favourite number which just makes you feel cheerful and inspired
The truth is, music of all genres and cultures, is a blessing, especially at times when we are alone, it can give us a feeling of connectivity. Music helps us to feel less isolated, giving a sense of belonging and as Mr Williams said is “a harmonic connection between all living things”.
Today I want us to think about the ways, like music, that we can find true inner happiness, how we can reach within and find our own inner peace.
As part of my “Conscious Uncoupling” programme, I work with many people that are struggling to move on after a breakup. They may even have been separated for a considerable amount of time but are just not able to let go of the past.
The truth is, none of us can move on, until we have our own inner strength back. As part of my ethos of “Conscious Uncoupling”, the first thing we do is come back to ourselves and find our own emotional balance and beauty within. So, let’s find ways to make that possible.
Think back to who you are
When we are in a relationship, it’s very easy to fall into liking the same things as each other. Sometimes, so much so that we forget who we really are. We no longer remember what we really loved to do, listen to, or even read before we were “a couple.” This can make things confusing when we break up, we can find ourselves thinking “was it my choice to go to Vegas or his?” “Do I really like going to lavish restaurants?” “Were U2 his favourite band or mine?” Our own hopes and dreams of going to a retreat in India; or camping at the Glastonbury Festival are deeply buried within.
What I encourage you to do is remember those buried dreams, the ones that you didn’t get the chance to pursue and plan them. Plan them now. What’s really important to you? What do you really love doing? How do you love being and feeling? Build that vision and give yourself new guiding light to the future.
Guide, don’t be guided
I’m not saying don’t listen to other people, we all need help and advice. However, sometimes, although meant with the very best intentions, other people’s opinions can pull us off our path. Go with your own gut feeling, with your heart, you’re the only one that really knows deep down what is going to make you happy. Hold that guiding light and base your decisions on “will that take me closer to my destination or draw me off track?”
Feel deeply into who YOU want to be? Now’s the time to take charge of your own destiny and not be defined by others. A new life is opening up for you. You might think this is just what happens for others, but not for you. Don’t let that thought distract you. I promise, it is possible for you too.
Don’t let time pass you by
Time is our most valuable asset. We can’t get time back, so don’t let days and weeks pass you by without doing the things that bring you joy. That could be spending time with friends and family, pursuing a hobby (maybe even one you’d forgotten all about), or luxuriating in a bubble bath. Whatever it is, cherish it, cherish you.
Start making your own memories, ones that are all about you and who you are.
Remember what YOUR music is
Remember the music that makes you happy, one that really makes you smile inside and listen to it again and again. Make a playlist as the soundtrack to your future.
Start and be that person, the one we are all wondering “What is it that is making her smile so much?”